Sutton 12 weeks

 

 

 

I can't believe 12 weeks have already passed. 12 weeks of me trying to figure out feeding and sleeping all the while you have it all figured out because you are healthy and growing and I am so very grateful for that. I feel so fortunate that I was able to take 12 weeks off from work to take care of you. I spent pretty much every waking moment of your life right there by your side. It is so bittersweet that I have to go back to work. This is the longest stretch of time that I will probably have with you for a long time and that makes me sooooo sad. However, I am going to help provide for our family and you have the two next greatest people stepping up to take care of you. Nana has just retired and will be joining Papa in taking care of you. Grateful doesn't begin to describe how fortunate and blessed I feel for them to be both willing and able to take on this role. They will seriously love you just as we do and I know you will be in the most wonderful of hands. I will miss your sweet smell and your coos and smiles most as I depart for work tomorrow. I know you will continue to grow and change right before my eyes and I truly hate that I will even have to miss a second of that. You are my answered prayer from above. Losing my mom so early in life was just so sad and all I will ever do is put in as much love and support towards your life as my mom did for mine. However, I pray and hope that I will be around muuuuch longer in your life. I hope to be by your side and to create memories that I just never got to make with my own mom. It really is a dream come true to have a daughter of my own. As hard as the last 12 weeks have been I would trade a single day I have spent with you. Even as you regressed with your sleep over this past week I know in the back of my head you WILL sleep through the night and I am just soaking up every last ounce of my last day with you. My love for you is so huge and I just can't wait to give you a kiss tomorrow morning as I hand you off to Nana and Papa and know that you will be loved and cared for all day long. I will be dying to get home to see you and I know you will be just as happy tomorrow afternoon as you were when I left you in the morning.

I will miss watching you stuff your entire fist in your mouth during the day.

I am sure you will be seeing more of your cousin Hope as you venture over to Nana and Papa's house

Your sweet smile when I say your name in that high pitched voice and you just coo and coo and flash that adorable smile at me.

Your brother couldn't be sweeter to you. When he is not busy playing with his toys he will sit on the bed with me and entertain you. He will call you his "boopsy boopsy girl," "baby Sutton," and "Sutina"

 You have been right there with us while we play pretend zoo and pretend that the roof is on fire while the pretend fire department comes to put the fire out.

You arms are always clenched so tight and flailing all about

You just started sleeping in your crib this week (and while you haven't really made it through the night yet you are always so happy in the morning)

You love to streeetch your arms after being in that swaddle all night long

 

I have been trying to get you on the 'perfect' schedule before I had back to work but I know with my schedule and all the different people caring for you each day we may stray here and there. As long as you continue to be healthy and grow that is the most important. You still do wonderfully during the day. You nurse then play for an hour then take your paci and either nap in your mama roo or your crib for 2 hours. I usually have to wake you up from your nap and then we repeat. At night you were sleeping from 9-6ish but over the past week as you have started moving and breaking free of your swaddle you have been waking up at all different times in the middle of the night. We are hoping you will sleep through the night for us soon!

I am just soo happy that I could spend this time with you are you turned into this precious little girl. I can't wait to watch you grow and change each day and to kiss your sweet face before and after work! We love you soo much Sutton!!